As parents age, it can be a major factor in changing the dynamics of the family unit. For many adult children there is a desire to help ensure that their parents are safe and well cared for; however, many older adults have a deep desire to remain independent and live with as much autonomy as possible. When you create a sense of capability and trustworthiness, it can positively impact their self-confidence, mental health and overall happiness. Ultimately the goal is not to “control” your parents. The goal is to create an atmosphere in which support is available to your parents if they need it.
Make Things Easier In The House
The home environment subtly limits the degree of independence a person can have. The small changes you make will eliminate barriers that gradually diminish independence.
You can start with lighting. Good lighting in hallways, kitchens, and stairs helps facilitate daily mobility. Easy-to-reach cupboards will reduce the need for an individual to stretch or climb to access items they need. You can even adjust your furniture layout to create pathways that provide both a safe and comfortable experience for them to walk through.
In addition to the rest of the house, it’s especially important to consider the bathroom since this is where most falls occur. Using simple fixtures such as sturdy grab bars or a non-slip floor will increase their confidence. These options should be functional and not look clinical.
Make Decisions With Them, Not For Them
Another error people make is fixing things too fast. When family members rush in to organize all of their parent’s life, the parent feels they have lost control over their own life.
Collaboration is a good alternative. If your parents need assistance for making appointments, transportation, or paying bills, involve them in the discussion and allow them to determine which method works best for them. Ask questions. Listen closely. Even if the answer is slow or the decision is different than what you thought would be the most efficient; respect their preference.
Use Technology To Your Advantage
Technology may be a means to assist in independence without intruding into their daily life. Many modern tools have been developed to provide some level of assurance, while continuing to assist individuals in their day-to-day lives.
The use of smart doorbells, reminder applications, and voice assistant systems can assist by providing reminders or quickly contacting family members. The use of these systems decreases their reliance on other people for completing many small, everyday tasks.
Some families will even research the best medical alert systems for seniors free, as they help seniors get assistance when they need it and allow them to remain independent. Knowing that there is assistance readily available to them often gives a senior more confidence and less fear of losing their independence.
Anchor Their Sense Of Purpose
Purpose, and routine involvement are key aspects of independence; it’s not just about safety. When we have the motivation to get up in the morning, go outside, and participate in day-to-day life we tend to do better.
You want to encourage activities that are aligned with their level of interest and energy. Gardening, volunteering, social clubs, and learning something new are all examples of things that help create purpose and routine. Also, things like going for a daily walk or visiting your favorite coffee shop on a regular basis will help you stay connected to your community.
To help your aging parents stay independent it may take time and thoughtful decisions. Some of the best ways to provide helpful support is by making changes at their home and communicating with them respectfully and by providing simple tools that will give them the confidence to be independent. When older parents are confident in themselves, they are likely to have a strong sense of who they are as individuals and better overall well-being.
